Friday, February 24, 2017

sixtynothing Episode 19 Familiarity Breeds Familarity

FADE IN
HELEN AND INEZ SIT HUDDLED TOGETHER ON HELEN'S TINY FRONT PORCH SMOKING CIGARETTES AND LOOKING OUT INTO POURING RAIN

INEZ
Does Emmy have a huge scar?

HELEN
Nah.  It's not too big.  My scar is much longer.  I was fifteen when my appendix burst.  I remember coming to and seeing that they'd shaved my pubes.  I felt violated and mortified.  

INEZ
I've been going for bikini wax.

HELEN
Ick.  My old Jew bush is so white now that it barely shows but I guess if I had a new boyfriend I'd consider it.

INEZ
Not a big deal.  Hurts a little the first time but you get used to it.

HELEN
I just can't imagine lying there spread eagle waiting for a stranger to pour hot wax over my mons pubis.

INEZ
You get pap smears don't you?

HELEN
Yeah.  But that's medical.  And believe me, if my doctor didn't hound me about it I'd pass on that too.

INEZ
Did you do any better with Emmy's beau?  You know, Nate really likes him.

HELEN
Oh God.  Was that fucking weird.  It turns out that Brandon's mom was bi-polar and had committed suicide right before he met Em.

INEZ
Youch.

HELEN
Yeah.  At first I was weirded out and also pissed that they'd kept it from me.

INEZ
Helen, you know, you yourself have sort of created a scenario where stuff is kept from you.

HELEN
Fuck you.  I think my judgey-ness is highly exaggerated.  

INEZ RAISES HER EYEBROW

HELEN
Okay.  Slightly exaggerated.  And as much as I hate to admit it, they were probably right to withhold the inside dope.  Being there for a week I got to see how they operate.  He doesn't have this sick mommy thing going at all.  He gets what she's going through.  He sees, that unlike his poor mom, Emmy is on top of things and accepts that she'll probably always have to be on meds and that she'll likely have to keep tweaking them.  As much as I love George, Brandon gets her on a much deeper level.  He's also, as Nate observed, incredibly bright.  

INEZ
Yeah, Nate said that you'd probably get to like him eventually.

HELEN
Did Nate know about the mom's suicide?

INEZ
Don't think so.  At least he didn't mention it to me.

HELEN
Brandon knows all about her meds, what she takes and when.  And he keeps up on the literature.  He read about a brand new drug.  Em asked her psychiatrist about trying it and she's doing really well. Not as logy as with the Depakote.  You know what else Emmy hadn't mentioned?

INEZ
What?

HELEN
Brandon's from old money.

HELEN AND INEZ HIGH FIVE

INEZ
How did Ian do when you were gone?  I left a message and he didn't call me back.

HELEN
He didn't call you back?

INEZ
Well, I was merciful and said that he didn't HAVE to call me back unless he needed something.  I guess he survived.

HELEN
The only casualty is that he tried to run the dishwasher.  Couldn't find the detergent so squirted in a bunch of dish soap.

INEZ
Oh God.  That must have been a big sudsy mess.

HELEN
The kitchen floor was very clean.  And he and Fido were very happy to see me.  Although he's in a big tizzy now.  It's intern season. He's got three people coming into the archive and inevitably they screw things up and ask him questions, forcing him to talk to them. I'm sure he'll come home fuming about some rare print getting ruined or some idiot who won't stop blathering.

INEZ
Well, he has a steady job and he's certainly loyal.

HELEN
That he is.  Emmy got on my case about smoking.  She says she's worried that Ian will outlive me and that she and Hannah will be stuck with him.  Get him a Russian mail order bride right away if anything happens to me. 

INEZ
We do need to stop smoking.

HELEN
Yeah, as soon as Trump is impeached...

INEZ
And we need to be more active.  With all this friggin' rain it's been nearly a month since we walked or gone to exercise.

HELEN
You know, they say it's over three miles if you go from one end of the new Ikea to the other.

INEZ
Let's do it tomorrow.  I love those meatballs.

CUT TO IAN AT THE FILM ARCHIVE SURVEYING THREE YOUNG INTERNS

IAN (Approaching an intern)
What are you doing?

INTERN
This reel doesn't have any leader.

IAN
You're putting sound leader on a silent print.  See, the silent film has perforations on both sides of the frame.

IAN LOOKS AROUND AND SNIFFS.  HE FLIPS A SWITCH THAT SAYS "DE-HUMIDIFIER.  DO NOT TOUCH."

Ian
Who turned off the de-humidifier?  It should never be turned off, especially in this weather.

INTERN 2
Oops. Sorry.  I thought it was a light switch.

THE THIRD INTERN, ROSE, IS WORKING ON A PRINT INTENTLY.  SHE WEARS A VERY SHORT SKIRT AND BOOTS AND IS FRESH FACED AND STUNNINGLY BEAUTIFUL.

ROSE
Professor MacIntyre, Can you help me with this.

IAN
Sure,  but call me Ian.

ROSE
Alright, Ian.  I'm confused about this print. It's Ride the Whirlwind.  The first reel is on Kodak stock.  The edge code chart dates it 1963 but the second reel is on Dupont stock and it has this weird stuff on it.  Look...

IAN APPROACHES THE REWINDS

IAN
Oh, those are commercial slugs from a TV print.  It must be a cannibalized print that some collector put together.  He probably had a couple of prints and assembled one with the best of all of them.  You need to check the running time in the catalog and put it on the inspection machine to see if it's complete. Good catch Rose. But let's do it tomorrow. It's time to clean up and head out.

IAN AND THE INTERNS PUT AWAY FILMS AND SUPPLIES.  ROSE LEANS OVER A TRIM BIN AND IAN ADMIRES HER LITHE BODY.  A HANDSOME YOUNG MAN ENTERS THE ROOM AND APPROACHES ROSE.  THEY KISS.

ROSE
Ian, this is my boyfriend Mark.

MARK 
Ahem...

ROSE
Oops.  Fiance.  We got engaged on Valentine's Day.

IAN 
Congratulations.

ROSE
Mark is a filmmaker. Is it OK if I show him around a little?

IAN
Of course.

MARK
Professor McIntyre, I just read your piece about Rossellini in Film Comment.  And of course your book on D.W. Griffith is seminal. I was so happy when Rose was accepted to the internship program.

IAN
Well, Rose seems to have a genuine aptitude. We're happy to have her.  What kinds of films do you make?

MARK
Documentaries.  

ROSE
C'mon Mark.  Don't be so modest.  He made BEAM OF LIGHT.  It was just on PBS.

IAN
Oh.  I saw that.  It was excellent.  That footage from the Imperial War Museum is stunning. Beautiful film.  Okay Rose, give him the nickel tour while I start locking up.

IAN WATCHES RATHER WISTFULLY AS HAND IN HAND THEY STROLL DOWN AN AISLE OF FILM RACKS.

CUT TO
HELEN IS STANDING AT THE STOVE WEARING A STAINED APRON OVER A HOUSE DRESS AND WINNIE THE POOH SLIPPERS.  HER HAIR IS MESSILY PILED ON TOP OF HER HEAD. IAN ENTERS.

HELEN
How are the interns? Do you want rice or potatoes?

IAN
Not bad. What's the main course?

HELEN
Trout.

IAN 
Potatoes.

HE APPROACHES HER, HUGS HER AND KISSES HER NECK

IAN
You smell like an ashtray.

HELEN
You smell like film cleaner.

IAN
I'll go take a shower.

HELEN
Good.

IAN
Remember when we used to take showers together?

HELEN
Yeah.

IAN
You wanna?

HELEN
Nope.

IAN
Good.

HELEN
Do you want spinach or broccoli?

IAN
Neither.

HELEN
I'll do the broccoli with the sun dried tomatoes and anchovy paste.

IAN
Okay.  That's not so bad. I'm glad you're back.

HELEN
Me too.

FADE OUT


Friday, February 17, 2017

sixtynothing episode 18 Emmy's Appendix


FADE IN
HELEN IS WALKING ON HER TREADMILL IN FRONT OF TELEVISION WITH TRUMP PRESS CONFERENCE ON AIR. SHE INCREASES THE SPEED AND THEN LOWERS IT WHEN HER BREASTS JIGGLE.  HER PHONE RINGS.

HELEN (on phone)
Hi Emmy.  I'm on the treadmill and out of breath so I'll call you right back....What?

HELEN TURNS OFF TREADMILL, JUMPS OFF, PACES

HELEN
It's on the lower right side of your abdomen?

HELEN
How long has it hurt?  Listen, stand up and raise your right leg from the hip.  Does it feel better?  Em, it sounds like appendicitis.  Listen.  Right now, and if there's no one to drive you, take an ambulance, go to the hospital.  Not urgent care.  The hospital emergency room. Right away.  Seriously Em.  It really sounds like appendicitis.  I'm going to try to book a red eye.  If it's just gas or you're constipated or something I'll cancel but it really sounds like appendix.  Call me the minute you see the doctor. I'm going to try to find a flight.  Go right now.  Right now.  Call me as soon as you know anything.

CUT TO
IAN WATCHES HELEN PACK.

IAN
You've diagnosed this by phone?  And even if it is her appendix, it's a common procedure. She's twenty one.  She's got lots of friends there.  I don't see why you have to rush off. You're not a doctor Helen.  She's a grown woman....

HELEN'S PHONE RINGS

HELEN
Hello?...Oh hi Brandon.  Yeah, I thought it was her appendix....gosh, they're prepping her already? Good god.  Tell her I'm on my way when she comes to.

HELEN (to Ian)
There's a huge hunk of smoked salmon in the fridge and a bowl of green beans. Don't just eat the fish. Eat the beans too. There are brownies in the freezer but don't eat too many of 'em.   If I'm gone for more than a few days I'll have Terry or Inez bring you more food. Will you drive me to LAX or should I take the bus from Union Station?

IAN
Is it those green beans with the yogurt?  I don't like those.

HELEN
No, it's the ones with onion and tomato.  Eat them.  We should leave in about twenty minutes.  I'll do some oatmeal for you in the pressure cooker.  Don't forget it's in there. You'll have Fido to keep you company.

IAN
Fido and I will both be bereft.

IAN PUTS HIS ARMS AROUND HELEN AND THEY EMBRACE.

CUT TO
HELEN BOARDS A CROWDED AIRPLANE, LUGGING A CARRY-ON

ANNOUNCEMENT
Our flight is completely full tonight ladies and gentlemen.  We'll get in the air sooner if you take your seats.  If the overhead bins are full ask a flight attendant to check your bag.

BLONDE MODEL TYPE IN FRONT OF HELEN (TO FLIGHT ATTENDANT)

There's no room for my bag but I have a tight connection.  I don't have time to check it.

SEVERAL MEN IN ADJACENT SEATS PERK UP, A YOUNG MAN JUMPS UP, REMOVES HIS OWN BAG FROM THE OVERHEAD AND REPLACES IT WITH THE BAG OF THE ATTRACTIVE YOUNG WOMAN, HANDING HIS OWN OFF TO FLIGHT ATTENDANT.

HELEN (to flight attendant)
I have a tight connection too.

NO ONE VOLUNTEERS TO HAVE A BAG CHECKED.  THE FLIGHT ATTENDANT TAKES IT FROM HELEN

FLIGHT ATTENDANT

I'll squeeze it into first class for you.

CUT TO
HELEN IS IN A MIDDLE SEAT BETWEEN TWO OVERWEIGHT PASSENGERS. SHE WEARS HEADPHONES AND HAS HER HOODIE PULLED DOWN TO SHIELD HER FACE.
  
SFX-A CAT IN A CARRIER YOWLING FROM THE SEAT BEHIND HELEN.  A BABY SCREAMING FROM TWO SEATS UP.  HELEN TAKES A PILL.

FADE TO
HELEN PULLS HER HOODIE DOWN FURTHER.  THE CAT CONTINUES TO YOWL AND THE BABY SCREAMS. HELEN TAKES ANOTHER PILL.

SFX (VOICE FROM BEHIND HELEN)  

I think the cat just pissed.

HELEN BURIES HER HEAD BETWEEN HER KNEES

CUT TO
HELEN DASHES IN TO EMMA'S HOSPITAL ROOM. EMMA IS PALLID AND HOOKED UP TO AN IV. BRANDON DOZES IN A CHAIR NEXT TO THE BED. HELEN TAPS HIM GENTLY AND HE STARTS.

BRANDON
Oh hi Helen.  It went fine. She's OK.  She'll be so happy you're here.  She's been stirring a little but she's not awake yet.

EMMA OPENS HER EYES AND WINCES

EMMA
Ow.  Hurts.

HELEN
It's OK.  They'll get you something for pain.

EMMA (starting to cry)
Mommy!  Oh Mommy,  It hurts.  Ow. Ow. Ow.

HELEN KISSES EMMA AND MURMURS
It's OK baby.  I'm here.  It's all OK. 

A DOCTOR TAPS SOFTLY ON THE DOOR FRAME AND ENTERS

DOCTOR GREEN
Hi.  Emma, you did just fine.  Is this your mom? I'm Dr. Green (HE EXTENDS HIS HAND AND SHAKES WITH HELEN AND PATS BRANDON ON THE SHOULDER)

DOCTOR GREEN
The nurse will be right in with some pain meds.  You said you're not allergic to codeine right?

HELEN
No, she's not.  

DR. GREEN
And I know she takes some mood stabilizers.  

HELEN
Yes, she takes Lithium and Depakote. I'm not sure of the dosages.

BRANDON
Actually, she just started on Vraylar.  She's titrating.  She's down to 100 mgs twice a day on the Depakote and up to 4.5 mgs on the Vraylar.

DR. GREEN
Let's get her pain managed and make sure her tummy's not upset before we start her back on the psychotropics.  Go ahead and bring those from home. The pharmacy here will charge a bundle,  If she's stable later in the afternoon go ahead and start her back on her meds.  I'll check back in later. She'll be fine.  Really.  Right Emma?

EMMA, UNCONVINCED. NODS HALF HEARTEDLY.  THE DOCTOR EXITS

BRANDON
I've got a class at two that I really can't miss.  I'm going to drop you at Emma's to get her car if that's OK.

HELEN
Good.  Thanks.  I'll bring her meds back too.

EMMA
Mommy. My car needs gas.  Bad.  It's on fumes, so gas it up right away.

BRANDON (SOFTLY, BENDING OVER EMMA)
I'm gonna drive your mom now.  She'll be back soon.  I'll be here right after class but text me if you need anything.

HE LOWERS HIMSELF TO KISS HER. EMMA SPUTTERS AND THEN RELEASES AN ENORMOUS STREAM OF VOMIT WHICH COVERS BRANDON'S SHIRT.

CUT TO
BRANDON, HAVING REPLACED HIS SHIRT WITH A HOSPITAL GOWN, DRIVES A LATE MODEL BMW Z4. HELEN IS IN THE PASSENGER SEAT.

BRANDON
I know I stink but I think it's too cold to open the windows. Sorry.

HELEN
It's not bad. This is a spectacularly beautiful car Brandon.

BRANDON
Yeah.  It was my mom's.

HELEN
Oh, she upgraded?

BRANDON
I wouldn't put it that way.  She died eight months ago.

HELEN
Oh my God!  Emmy said nothing about this.  I can't believe it. I am so sorry.

BRANDON
I asked Emmy not to tell you.

HELEN
Oh?

BRANDON
My mother took her own life.  She had a long history of mental illness. 

HELEN
Jesus.  Oh Brandon.  I don't know what to say.  I can't imagine anything more devastating. 

BRANDON
She was in and out of institutions forever. Her family was ashamed and thought it was some sort of character flaw. Em's real lucky.
We thought you would think it weird that we got together about a month after my mom died. And to tell it, it does sound weird.

HELEN
I don't know Brandon.  Maybe she was right to wait to tell me. I'm ashamed to say that I can't promise that I would have been particularly magnanimous.

BRANDON
Understood. It's not like I have a mental illness fetish or anything.  I came back to school a few weeks after the suicide. Everyone felt terrible.  I could tell. They wanted me to feel better but no one knew what to say. Then little Emmy bounds up to me in the dining hall one day.  She looks me right in the eye and says, "I'm bipolar. I want to talk to you about your mom."

HELEN
That's my Emmy.  Very direct.  

BRANDON
Yeah.  Must get it from her father.

THEY BOTH LAUGH.  BRANDON PULLS UP TO EMMA'S HOUSE.

BRANDON
Cat is there.  She'll give you Emmy's keys. The drugs are in the bathroom.  Remember Vrylar, Depacote and Lithium.  Cat is going to stay at her boyfriend's so you have her room.  There are clean sheets on the bed. And the car has a full tank.

CUT TO
EMMY IS IN HER OWN BED, PROPPED UP ON PILLOWS, WEARING HER PUSSY HAT AND A T-SHIRT THAT SAYS "Nevertheless, she persisted." HELEN ENTERS WITH A BOWL OF SOUP, SITS DOWN BESIDE EMMY ON THE BED AND OFFERS EMMY A SPOONFUL. 

EMMY
Will you teach me to make chicken soup before you die?

HELEN
Maybe.

EMMY
I can't believe that you knew it was my appendix?

HELEN
You know what bubbameister is?

EMMA
A Yiddish beermaker?

HELEN
No.  It means "old wive's tales."  Grandma knew all these odd things, which always sound totally crackpot but are always right. Like if you have abdominal pain and it's relieved by raising your right leg it mean appendicitis.

EMMA
And that thing where if someone is choking you make them hold their arms straight up in the air?

HELEN
Yeah.  That was from Grandma too.

EMMA
I remember you'd make everyone at the table hold their arms straight up too so I wasn't as embarrassed. Brandon said that he told you about his mom.  Are you mad I didn't tell you?

HELEN
It was a big shock.  And I couldn't very well have told you to break it off with the boy whose mom killed herself...

EMMA
Oh, you probably would have. Plus, you loved George.

HELEN
Yes.  I loved George.  I thought Brandon was sort of neurasthenic but I guess that the poor thing was just sad. I see how things are playing out with you and Brandon now and how you guys take care of each other. I have to admit that your instincts about yourself are more acute than mine.

EMMA
Ok.  Now I want you to say it explicitly. Say "You were right and I was wrong."

HELEN
I just spent nine hundred bucks on a last minute fare so that won't be happening. Don't say anything to Pop by the way. I told him I used miles.  Brandon comes from money, doesn't he?

EMMA
Heaps and heaps.  So even if he does have some sort of Freudian mental illness mother-girlfriend thing you love him to death.

HELEN
Do you really think Mommy is that shallow Emmy?

EMMA
I knows it.

CUT TO
BRANDON IS CURLED UP AT THE FOOT OF EMMA'S BED. BOTH OF THEM ARE ASLEEP.  HELEN ENTERS AND TURNS OFF THE LIGHT.




Saturday, February 11, 2017

sixtysomething Episode #17 Moana COD

FADE IN
HELEN AND HER HELPER, TERRY ARE WORKING IN HER KITCHEN.  HELEN IS CUTTING SANDWICHES INTO THE SHAPE OF A FLIP FLOP SANDAL AND TERRY IS APPLYING SLENDER STRIPS OF CARROT AND CELERY TO RESEMBLE STRAPS


HELEN
We'll I guess that's one advantage of being a grandma Terry, you know who Moana is.  I would have been totally clueless.

TERRY (hoarsely) 
Yeah.  We had an all Moana Christmas and I am so sick of those songs...

HELEN
You're sick sick.  You sound like crap.

TERRY
No, I'm better.  I'm OK really.  My throat is just a little sore.

HELEN WIPES HER HAND ON A TOWEL AND APPLIES IT TO TERRY'S FOREHEAD

HELEN
Tienes calentura.  You're out of here.

TERRY
Let's just finish this stuff up and I'll do the drop off and go home.

HELEN
Nope.  I'll finish and drop it off myself. Client is a high maintenance bitch anyway. And cheap, to boot.  Probably best that I take care of it.   I'm calling you an Uber.

HELEN PICKS UP HER PHONE

TERRY
I take another aspirina and I can finish. There's too much for you.

HELEN
William will be here in a green Prius in seven minutes.  Just give me the key to the van.  We don't have anything until that cocktail thing in South Pas on Wednesday so stay home.  And tell them to stop playing that Moana crap so you can get some rest.

CUT TO
HELEN MANEUVERS THE VAN UP A LONG STEEP DRIVEWAY, PARKS AND REMOVES A LARGE TRAY.  A YOUNG HISPANIC WOMAN--GLORIA--THE HOUSEKEEPER, COMES OUT THE BACKDOOR FOLLOWED BY DAPHNE, A SIX YEAR OLD GIRL IN A POLYNESIAN DRESS.

HELEN
I'm dropping the catering.

THE WOMAN AND HELEN CARRY TRAYS FROM THE VAN INTO THE KITCHEN.

DAPHNE
I'm Moana!

HELEN
Yes, I see that.  Is it your birthday?

DAPHNE
I'm six! 

DAPHNE REACHES UP TO THE COUNTER AND STARTS TO PEEL BACK THE FOIL FROM ONE OF THE TRAYS.

GLORIA
Not now Daphne,  Leave it alone.  Wait for the party.

DAPHNE
I'm not Daphne.  I'm Moana.  Mommy's having a massage and Daddy's at the Gelson's getting my cake.. 

HELEN
That's great Moana.  Mommy should be nice and relaxed and you'll have a fun party.  I made the most yummy food I could think of for you.

HELEN (to housekeeper)
Everything's labelled.  You just have to stick the fruit skewers into the pineapple. Put the coconut chicken meatballs covered at about 325 for twenty minutes before you plate them.  The dragon eggs, and the flip flop sandwiches can go straight to the plate. Here's a bag of herbs to garnish them with.
Do you think Annie will come out soon?  I need to get paid.

GLORIA
We can't bother her when she's having a massage but it shouldn't be too long.  This food looks so good.  How do you get the hard boiled eggs so purple?

HELEN
They're marbleized. You cook 'em and gently crack the shells and soak 'em over night in food coloring.  The yoke filling has sesame oil and a little wasabi.  Everything is gluten free except the sandwiches.

SFX--SHRILL WOMAN'S VOICE--
Gloria!  Gloria!

ANNIE, IN A THICK PINK TERRYCLOTH ROBE RUSHES INTO THE KITCHEN.

ANNIE
Gloria, Pixie pooped on the lawn again.   Right where we're putting the party favors. (LOOKING AT HELEN)  Oh, you're the caterer.

GLORIA GRABS A PLASTIC BAG AND EXITS

HELEN
Right. Helen.  I told Gloria how to plate everything so you just need to take care of the balance.

ANNIE
All this stuff is on foil trays!  We can't put out foil trays!

HELEN
Yeah, You contracted for a drop off.  That means we don't plate or serve.  I was super clear about that.  I guess you don't remember.

ANNIE
I don't wanna use my good serving stuff for a bunch of kids.  I really thought you'd provide something.

HELEN
I can pull up the contract on my phone if you want to check it.

ANNIE
No, I don't have time for this now.  I have to get showered and dressed!  

ANNIE EXAMINES THE TRAYS

ANNIE
I see the gluten free.  Where's the vegan?

HELEN
The fruit skewers are vegan.  You said you needed some gluten free, which is everything but the sandwiches.  I asked about vegan and you said no.  I have the contract...

ANNIE
Well, Wendy and little Joyce are coming now.
They're vegans!

HELEN
Don't have ESP. Could have done something if you'd let me now.  Chloe, the vegan restaurant next to the Wholefoods 365 can probably do some stuff for you. Or there's that Little Pine place on Rowena but they might not be open...

ANNIE
Can you have it back here before noon when the party starts?

HELEN
You'll have to get someone else to take care of it Annie.  I have you scheduled for a drop off only.  I just need you to take care of the balance...

ANNIE
I think I already paid you.

HELEN (HANDING ANNIE INVOICE)
Nope.  That was a deposit.  Here's the invoice with the balance due...

ANNIE
Ok.  Just leave it. We'll mail you a check.

HELEN
Sorry.  We don't extend credit.  You'll have to take care of it now.

GLORIA RETURNS, GOES TO THE SINK AND WASHES HER HANDS

ANNIE
Gloria, go get my purse.  She didn't bring anything vegan so you'll have to go over and pick something up.  What's the name of the place?

HELEN
Chloe.

GLORIA ENTERS AND HANDS ANNIE HER PURSE.  ANY REMOVES A CARD FROM HER WALLET AND HELEN RUNS SLIDES IT THROUGH HER PHONE.  HELEN GRIMACES AND THEN SLIDES IT AGAIN.


HELEN
Annie, this card isn't working.  Do you have another?

ANNIE
Oh, those phone things never work right.  Try it again.  

HELEN SWIPES THE CARD ONE MORE TIME

HELEN
Sorry Annie, Let's try another card.

ANNIE
Let me write you a check.

HELEN
I'll need you to try another card please Annie.

ANNIE, IRRITATED, PRESENTS HELEN WITH ANOTHER CREDIT CARD.  HELEN SWIPES IT.

HELEN
That one worked.  We'll e-mail you the receipt.  

ANNIE
Gloria, run over to that place and get something vegan.   And then get the party bags set up and try to put the food on something not breakable.  You better take Daphne with you cause I'm going to be in the shower.

ANNIE EXITS.  HELEN ROLLS HER EYES

GLORIA
Her husband is nice and I like the little girl.  Good you made her pay.

HELEN
Que puta!

GLORIA
De veres.

CUT TO HELEN DRIVING VAN DOWN STEEP DRIVEWAY.
SFX--RADIO
TRUMP
They're criminals and take jobs away from American citizens...

HELEN PUSHED TO CHANGE TO A HIP HOP STATION AND BOPS HER HEAD

Fade out